MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE / Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge (2004)

Some people are never going to understand what Gerard Way et al. brought to the world. That isn’t an empty teenage retort. I’m over 30 for fucks sake. This was envisioned as a concept album but became fractured somewhere between thought and execution. The cracks were filled with raucous anthems and a smidgin of their own flavor of cabaret before being brought to life by impassioned screams. MCR were never content with delivering songs to keep you sobbing in the corner. They wanted you to rise up and kick life’s ass all the way across the ball room.

Those who get it know that it’s not just about what MCR brought to the world, but what they’ve kept in it.

Songs of Note: It's Not a Fashion Statement, It's a Fucking Deathwish; Cemetery Drive

4½ Forcibly Vacated Graves out of 5

FLUX OF PINK INDIANS / The Fucking Cunts Treat Us Like Pricks (1984)

The title and art are both clearly meant to offend, but not in a juvenile way. It's a direct, if obtuse, method of raising awareness for one of the themes explored on the album: the kind of abuse that goes on behind closed doors. It's also a noisy, feedback-infused, hate-filled attack on the kind of society that allows such activity to happen. When I say 'noisy,' I mean it. Even fans of traditional anarcho-punk may find the tumultuous compositions challenging or even deplorable.

Songs of Note: Hard Sell; Love Song

3 aggressors out of 5

YELLO / Flag (1988)

The funky Cuban rhythms and Electro oddness that was once daring and imaginative teeters on the brink of self-parody. There are nine tracks and three of them are variations of the same song. That's too much repetition, guys, even if you are having a laugh at your own expense some of the time.
There are some stand out tracks that you'll likely skip to each time, but they only serve to highlight how lacklustre the remainder of the album really is.

Songs of Note: Of Course I'm Lying; The Race

2½ car commercials out of 5

HELLOWEEN / Unarmed – Best of 25th Anniversary (2009)

Helloween celebrated their 25th year by re-recording some of their classics in an acoustic/symphonic style. The addition of piano works nicely, but my initial reaction was that the majority of the arrangements weren't particularly well-suited to the change. That is until I got to the seventeen minute Keeper's Trilogy (a medley of  Halloween, Keeper of the Seven Keys, and The King for a 1000 Years), which is aided by a seventy-piece Prague Symphony Orchestra and choir. When the strings and percussion kick in for real, when the choir soar and the cymbals crash, I began to think that YES, it was a damn good idea after all. But it doesn't last. Things begin to slump again afterwards. Curses. Still, it was fun while it lasted.

Songs of Note: The Keeper's Trilogy; A Tale That Wasn't Right

2½ withered pumpkins out of 5

ANASTASIA VRONSKI AND RICARDO ALRUCINI / The Groom is Still Waiting for the Bride at the Altar (2011)

One track lasting 23 minutes that never once feels like it's gone on too long. It reminds me of music designed to give atmosphere to tabletop RPGs, except it has some haunting and creepy spoken word throughout documenting the opening of the 6th seal, from the Revelation of John the Apostle.
The instrumentation is equally as unsettling. There's rattling chains, creaking protestations from ancient wood and ritualistic drums.
When the sky splits apart and the land moves, it turns to noise. It feels then as if the horrors it's documenting are happening right at your feet and you better not look down unless you want to be a part of them.

Songs of Note: The Groom is Still Waiting for the Bride at the Altar

5 falling stars out of 5

THE BOMBS OF ENDURING FREEDOM / The Bombs Of Enduring Freedom (2007)

After James Fogarty (co-founder of TMoA) put a temporary end to Ewigkeit, he started TBoEF, a project that enabled him to focus his energies on creating politically charged industrial/electronic music that's both blackly humorous and paradoxically serious. This first album isn't musically groundbreaking, but it's full of life and highlights how important creative freedom is to the process. He has no one looking over his shoulder. And his distribution methods are the best there is: if all you want is a Digital D/L you can have all of Bombs' albums free from the wonderful Death To Music Productions.

Songs of Note: Beware the Bombs...; G.I. Jesus

3 cracks of the whip out of 5

MINISTRY / The Mind is a Terrible Thing to Taste (1989)

The industrial genre owes a huge debt to Killing Joke, but Ministry really ought to owe them some royalties, too. They took everything that was good about KJ and turned it to max by adding extra aggression (borrowed from thrash) and some film samples, then fed that through a distorted sieve.
Allowing Chris Connelly to take primary vocal duties on some tracks helped immensely. Al's distorted diatribes are great in context, but Connelly's deranged ramblings are, for me, a highlight on an album by a band that in turn became as influential to others as KJ had been to them. It took Industrial to the masses.

Songs of Note: Thieves; Breathe

4½ hypocrites and bastards out of 5

THE JUSTIFIED ANCIENTS OF MU MU / 1987, What the Fuck is Going On? (1987)

The début album by The JAMs (later the KLF) will be hard to find in its original incarnation because every unsold copy was ordered destroyed by the MCPS; the reason being that the work is constructed from unauthorised samples from a large number of sources. THAT was the point. It was pushing "plagiarism to its absurd conclusion" in the best way possible, through musical and social juxtaposition.
It’s a collage of everything that was supposed to be good and everything that was genuinely bad about the era, and its existence brought that same focus to the fore in everyone that heard it and how they reacted to it.
The JAMs didn't care about profit, they cared about the JAMs, and in all probability they'd give you the album free if they could. But for now, YouTube it instead.

Songs of Note: Links are periodically obliterated. Do a YT search.

3 applecarts out of 5

KATY PERRY / One of the Boys (2008)

I would love to say that this is simply an endlessly hypnotic pop album, but the fact is the majority of these songs have poignant, forceful, or (if nothing else) deliciously emo lyrics. Shit, even the surface novelty of I Kissed A Girl and Ur So Gay can’t bring this down. Katy is entirely adept at both exploring morose depths and soaring as high as her intermittent self-confidence and worth will allow. She’s not shy about cutting down chauvinistic and soulless men, either.

I can’t personally comment on her later, more popular work, but this is the truest definition of a gem completely hidden in plain sight.

Songs of Note: Thinking of You; Fingerprints

4½ Fucks Not Given out of 5

WHITE ZOMBIE / Astro-Creep: 2000 – Songs of Love, Destruction and Other Synthetic Delusions of the Electric Head (1995)

WZ's most commercially successful album sold millions of copies, but it's not their best work. It's boring. Film samples in music are something I really enjoy when done correctly, there's a perfect balance that can be found between the two, but you won’t find it in Astro-Creep. Too many intros interrupt the flow, and when the music eventually does come it's uninspired. They peaked on the previous album and, unable to progress musically, simply go around in circles on this one.

Songs of Note: Creature of the Wheel; Blood, Milk and Sky

2½ bug parades out of 5

BATHORY / Jubileum: Volume III (1998)

The third and final Jubileum collection begins with a track from one of the crap Bathory albums, but if you skip past it hurriedly you'll discover six previously unreleased tracks from as early as '84. Yay.
I'm repeating myself, but once again the running order is a disaster. Placing a track from Blood on Ice (1996) after the aggressive Satan My Master is a perfect example of what I mean. Of course we'll buy it for the rare stuff, but the gnomes at Black Mark need a damn good whipping for being so lazy.

Songs of note: In Nomine Satanas; Gods of Thunder, of Wind and of Rain

3 posthumous goats out of 5

THE ALAN PARSONS PROJECT / I Robot (1977)

Readers of science fiction will recognise the title of the album. It’s a conceptual work that was originally about Asimov's Robot Series but was later changed to be less specific. Lyrically it's still heavily influenced by the author's writings, but musically it's Parsons' and Woolfson's special blend of experimentation, prog guitars, futuristic synth, funk and the usual amount of timeless melodies.

Songs of Note: I Wouldn't Want to Be Like You; Don't Let it Show

4½ other places out of 5

ASHLEE SIMPSON / Autobiography (2004)

Did Ashlee have help writing these songs? Yes. However, there’s enough charming, off-kilter wording to convince me that she was largely allowed to do exactly what she wanted. Those awkward turns of phrase and her various squeaks and off-key warbling would have been ironed out systematically if Joe and the record label were the guiding force behind this. Not every track hits the mark but the soul-bearing is nicely balanced with measured catchiness and sass. Perhaps best of all is the theme of embracing one’s flaws that’s loosely threaded throughout.

3 Girls Who Know They Like it Rough out of 5

Songs of Note: Autobiography; Love Me For Me

FIELDS OF THE NEPHILIM / Dawnrazor (1987)

The cover art looks like it promises a musical version of John Carpenter's The Fog, but the music within is 90% Sisters of Mercy and 10% Ennio Morricone. Plus, it has Carl McCoy being mysterious and emotionally pained - just like Andrew Eldritch does, yes. If any of that sounds like it'll float your goat, then you're all set.

Songs of Note: Vet for the Insane; Preacher Man

4 weeping flowers out of 5

DEAD CAN DANCE / Live Happenings I-V (2012)

The series of 5 live EPs self-released by DCD via their website is now available from the same place as one complete purchase consisting of 21 tracks.
Now is the part of the review where I attempt to describe the band's sound using existing genre labels and find that I'm completely unable to do so. Nothing I can say will come close to the Gothic beauty and ethereal purity of the work. It either speaks to you on a personal level or it doesn't. The media calls them neoclassical dark wave. That's as helpful as saying that Lisa Gerrard is a gal who can sing.

Songs of Note: The Ubiquitous Mr. Lovegrove; How Fortunate the Man with None

5 beautiful journeys out of 5